Saturday, November 7, 2009

Looking for a writing job?

From time to time, I collect odd, weird, crazy and just sometimes pathetic Craigslist listings from people who want writers. Note that spelling is exactly as the original postings. While some of Craigslist ads are from real producers, these are from people who seem to expect the writer to work for free or almost free.

These are all real. 

Date: 2007-10-20, 10:39AM PDT
A four plot film story. I need opposing points of view to assist in the process of making the pieces of the puzzle fit. Please respond as if you are applying for a real job...otherwise this is a waste of both of our time. I would ask to know about a paragraph worth of story about you as a person, what your experience as a writer is, and what you hope to get out of this. I am interviewing today in Hollywood at a Hollywood, right?
When you meet me, you will be delighted as to how down to earth I am as well as creative and driven. Thank you so much!

Date: 2007-10-23, 10:21AM PDT
I work from home a lot and I would love the company of someone else. Just having someone working from their computer or reading would help me a lot. I use the phone for my work but otherwise it is a quiet environment. I am a nice, fun ,outgoing girl, and always looking to explore new things. I live in West Hollywood. Please let me know if this sounds like something you would be interested in. Location: LA

Date: 2007-10-26, 9.13 PDT
BOOM! Drop me right into the conflict, let's get this baby going on rails! We're looking for a snarky, dark comedy with a unique twist on every day life. Accessible and with a warm message, yet a thoroughly entertaining escape from the audience's 9-5.
Hold the blood, bombs and bravado and instead give me clever characters and witty dialog. No fantasy dreamscapes and extended montages that don't advance the damn story; as an alternative, think coffeshops and dry cleaners.
-- Approx. $200K production see the "No blood, bombs or bravado" part,
-- Non-union feature,
-- Submit first five (5) pages in an open format, e.g. pdf, txt,
-- Append an overall story synopsis, and finally
-- Your estimated price or rate.

Date: 2007-10-26, 12:01AM PDT
Hi, I would like to hire a somewhat accomplished Comedy Writer to help me finish a somewhat goofy Christmas Who-Done-It Comedy that I have been sitting on for more than 10 years. What I have at the moment is about a 27 page Outline with a fair amount of Dialog intermixed. What I am looking for is someone to help me turn it into the next Christmas Classic.

I know you might think I am getting over dramatic here, but after all this time, I still think it could make a very funny and enjoyable movie. Think of it as a mix between Miracle on 34th street, ELF and Clue, with a little dash of other Christmas Stories and a little Song and Dance. Sounds a little goofy and fun, I hope so.

My basic requirements are to find someone who has good Comedic timing, can handle slapstick or goofy Physical Comedy, who’s a sucker for Christmas Stories (like me) and knows there way around a Scripts’ Structure, Plotline and Character Arch. So it wouldn’t get blown out of the water immediately because of glaring Structural flaws.

I am open to anyone who wants to let loose and have some fun with it, so long as it conforms to normal Script Structure.

I am willing to pay $1,000.00 dollars ($500.00 to start and $500.00 upon completion), plus 30% of what ever I would get for the script if I were to finish it on my own. The reason I say it that way is because once a Studio gets involved, who knows what they might require like a Rewrite or different Writer, who knows!! So, all I can offer is a percentage of what I would get if I were to complete the Script on my own, because that is something I have control over.

If you are interested, please respond via email and I will get back to you. At some point during the process I will want to see a Writing sample.

Date: 2007-10-26, 5:09PM PDT
Seeking a professional editor who has experience in editing screenplay. I have a script, that's 120 pages that needs a quick read-through to fix my grammatical and stucture errors.
The script will be on final draft. Fix as you read along, shouldn't take that long and turn around time is extremely important. Please email if interested

Date: 2007-10-26, 6:09PM PDT
$15 per page for a 120 page script that includes concepts and starts of pieces I have written. You will be paid at the end of each week up to 120 pages = $1800.

Date: 2007-10-27, 9:01AM PDT
Hello Everyone, we are looking for a ghoswriter that will assist us
in writing a sci-fi film. You will be paid a small fee for your time. You
will not get credit for the writing, however we do not require that
you have experience in scriptwriting - we only care about the
quality of your writing.
What's in it for you? Aside for a fee which we will discuss later on,
it will be a great opportunity for you if you are in the business.
Your work will be looked over, reviewed, critiqued and fine tuned by
an established major film screenwriter that has written for some of
the major studios in Hollywood. You have seen many of his work in
Blockbuster Films with some of the Top A Celebrities.

We will draw up a contract and we may need for you to sign a
confidentiality agreement. You will first have a meeting with me and
my partner and perhaps a third person so that we are all on the
same page. We will go over what we want and and if you are the
'right' one then we will go over your contract.

Please email me if you're interested.

If you have some sample writings, please email them to
our Assistant


Date: 2007-10-17, 6:10PM PDT
Looking for a writer for a creative collaboration. I am going to start working on a student film project. It will be episodic and I am looking for someone to help me develop story ideas, plots, and explore different themes. The project is fantasy action. I'm looking for SERIOUS writers who are looking to use creativity and dedication. I am planning of filming these in the summer so I need some one as soon as possible to get the ball rolling. Screenplay writing exeperience perferred but not necessary. Thank you, look foward to hearing from you .

Date: 2007-10-15, 12:57PM PDT
I wrote a treatment for a tv series. I need someone to look at it, edit it and add to it. Your pay would be a percentage of it if it was ever picked up. Thanks!

Date: 2007-10-29, 9:12AM PDT
I have the concept and outline of a funny, off-beat comedy/ sort of defies description. I am not a writer, but have a great start on something amazing. I need the help of a professional to make it work. I have no idea how this is supposed to take place, so please forgive my ignorance up front. Email me for more info. Thanks!

Date: 2007-10-31, 8:35PM PDT
I have a book, printed and ready. I have many other spin offs from this book.  I need an agent and a lawyer.  Help me change my life.

Reply to:
Date: 2007-11-03, 9:50PM PDT
that's right, i have a multi BILLIONAIRE idea for a childrens t.v. show. i just need a 22 minute pilot. no spec script needed. i have a huge company out their with the money to fund this project, i just need a script. serious writers only, who want to quit the rat race.
818 392 0243

Date: 2007-11-26, 5:39AM PST
we are presently seeking scripts for hollywood productions. if you have a hit please contact

Date: 2007-12-06, 9:07PM PST
Do you have what it takes as a screenwriter to get your script shot and produced? We are a new production company looking for GREAT, and I mean GREAT screewriters with AWESOME scripts that can be shot, produced and submitted to Film Festivals or pitched to networks. Here are the rules:

YOU the writer, choose the genre and length. It can be a feature, short film or pilot series but make sure it is AWESOME and UNIQUE. It can be something new or something you wrote already but it must be GREAT! We will review scripts and let you know if we will move foward with producing your script and making it a reality.

Reply to:
Date: 2007-12-11, 7:15AM PST
I have perhaps the greatest script ready to be made into a series. It is registered with the union and at this point I'm looking for some investors for a pilot and to pitch it to the studios. It's unique and would cause quite a stir. Please email me asap so that we can get started.

Date: 2007-12-13, 5:33AM PST
I am trying this out before I go to more traditional routes.
I am looking for a writer consultant I am writing various books but I am terrible. I need someone to take my ideas and make them look great for publishing.
First time author ... willing to pay send resume or bio... whatever the norm is.
Thanks, Mike

What if I had a great tv show concept...would you write it for us? If you like modern sci-fi, suspense, action, and the supernatural then I am confident you won't disagree with this concept. And you should have an appreciation for television shows like 24 and Heroes.
I have written 3 screenplays (unproduced), but never a television show.I haven't registered the concept/summary yet, to be honest.I just want producer credit, story concept by credit.

And of course help you develop the characters and plot, as it thickens each episode.Please email me if you are interested, and maybe if you have any contacts in Hollywood that could at least get the pilot made.Thanks and take care.

Date: 2009-01-17, 8:32PM PST
kari bian just finished 3 projects; time to start the next feature movie: I need a sophisticated brilliant intelligent writer with a big imagination, Not nassasery to explain who you are do-not send resume, i two lines just tell me why you deserve to get this job. compensation $5000 plus 2 points.

Date: 2009-08-31, 11:48AM PDT
Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?

Dear Hollywood Insider,
I’ll get straight to the point: I have a number of extraordinary screenplays just crying out to be made into movies, but I can’t do it without your help. My screenplays perfectly walk the line between art and high concept —think Steven Spielberg crossed with vintage Woody Allen. All feature the kinds of juicy, multi-faceted characters Hollywood’s A-listers would sell their souls to play. There’s a ton of money to be made, millions of hearts to touch, and gazillions of Oscars to be won.

Your job? Simply get my screenplays under the eyeballs of some of Hollywood’s “influencers.”

What’s in it for you? Here’s my humble proposal: When my first screenplay sells I’ll immediately give you 50% of the paycheck . Think about that. If my first script sells for $500,000, you’ll immediately snare $250,000. I’m willing to make this lunatic offer because, frankly, I know if I can just get my foot in the door, my screenwriting career is set. I also have an unfortunate history of skin cancer, so if I contract a terminal case tomorrow, I’ll never forgive myself for not having written this letter.

If this strikes a chord somewhere inside you, please contact me at your earliest convenience. I know I wasn’t put on this planet to be a cubicle monkey, and perhaps you’d like to send some positive karma into the universe while helping a struggling artist at the same time.

I've been badly burned by phony literary agents in the past, so please tell me a little about yourself and why you think we’d make a truly dynamic duo.

I sincerely look forward to forming a long-term, mutually beneficial relationship with you.