One of the constants in this business is; Am I gonna actually get to make this movie?". They say actors get the most rejections and this is evident in the speeches they make at any award ceremony. You'd think they found a cure for cancer.
And after that it could arguably be writers, given that their pitches and outlines and screenplays are more than often turned down than made. And sometimes even when the script is bought or optioned, it never gets made.
At least writers get turned down because of their writing, actors get turned down because of the way they look. For example I remember Melissa Leo (who won Best Supporting this year) from a series called Homicide back in 1993 and said to myself, she's not pretty but she's pretty damn good as an actor. And finally it paid off but it took years.
My friends are saying this Ghostkeeper windfall that seems to come to me without me even asking, is the fruit of the many years I've put into this business. And I admit it feels good to get some attention although Ghostkeeper isn't the story I'm burning to tell. You know that it's Emperor of Mars.
But somehow I feel I owe it to the old Ghostkeeper, because that movie led me to a pretty good 30 years, up and down to be sure, but always moving forward.
So why am I so worried that it'll all fall down.
Because that's the general rule.
Even now, as I write the new proposal (which I'll post soon), there are moments when I wonder if it will really happen. That Catholic school part of me says that just when everything is going good... "you're gonna die". Or something like that.
And a director friend doesn't help when he says "Be careful crossing streets".
Age is definitely a factor, when I was 22 I would take any dare and expect to win every time. But years and a few accidents on mountain bikes and bad TV shows made me a little more mortal. Not to mention losing both parents over the last 10 years.
As someone once said, "you're next".
I have to admit that this Ghostkeeper remake is probably the most confident project I've had in years, the pieces are falling together faster than I can keep count. So what else can I worry about?
Well, what if one or more of the actors still alive, don't want to be in the movie or we can't find them anymore? The answer is simply "change the script". But one of the corners I'm putting myself in is this; if only one element changes, I could be stuck.
What can happen?
1. One or more of the actors can't/won't be in it. Having the 4 original actors in the movie is crucial.
2. The hotel decides not to give us the permission to film there.
3. There's no snow in that window of 6 weeks when the hotel closes for awhile.
4. We can't find all the funding in time.
Also I have written and directed 3 movies, and had complete freedom on all of them. Now, if we have a funding distributor, they're gonna want to be on set standing behind me all the time and watching those damn monitors.
But for now, I guess I am moving forward, because that's the only thing I know, never go backwards, you just tend to fall alot.
(Mon: new details)
